Archive for the ‘Good Snark’ Category

What does CALM mean to you?

Sunday, December 30th, 2007

For most people, the letters C – A – L – M spell the word, “calm.”

For The Husband, inexplicably, the letters C – A – L – M form an acronym for “Cat Ass-Licking Mode.”

And I married him. Voluntarily.

Busted

Thursday, August 23rd, 2007

Confession time.

I hoard things — usually cash, but I also stockpile stuff. For example, I have an irrational fear of running low on toilet paper, so I buy the 12-packs and store the extra rolls in a container under the bed. The box under the bed also holds the overflow from my trips to Costco. Needless to say I store money in unexpected places around the house. It pleases me to know it’s there… somewhere. See, I don’t always remember creating a cash stash, but it does provide the fun of running across a little pile of money from time to time.

I find life as a human squirrel rather satisfying despite the jeers I receive from my dear, dear spouse.

I recently had to raid my cache of Taco Bell mild sauce packets when faced with a dry taco situation. Here’s what I found among the packets:

Ms. Squirrel

Apparently The Husband found the stash of fast food restaurant condiment packets I hid in a cabinet he rarely opens. And he felt the need to leave snarky evidence that he found my hidey-hole.

I must admit that I laughed until I hurt when I found it. That husband of mine is pretty funny.

Now I’ve got to run and find a new secret location for these condiments.